Yesterday, I talked about the numerous concurrent events that go on both in the public eye and in the background at a wedding. Also the challenges that can happen if those puzzle pieces don't fit together. That's why I live by "the nudge" - I call it my no-fail technique for getting all of the pieces of the timeline to fit together. "The nudge" allows me and my staff to keep things happening and one event flowing into the next, even if something got a little behind or ahead schedule. Authenticity is really important to me at a wedding, and I loathe the idea of a wedding coordinator being a kind of "time nazi" who is only concerned with making things happen according to that piece of paper.
And it's really as simple as this: about 15 minutes before each key wedding timeline event is about to happen, I casually sidle up to whoever is key to making it happen and "nudge" them to say "How's it going?" Perhaps I'm asking the photographer, "Hey, we're expecting guests in about 15 minutes, do you think we'll be able to wrap it up pretty soon?" Or, to the caterer, "Soooo...cocktail hour is about to end in about 15 minutes, how's that buffet coming?" The trick is to be extremely casual and low-key, (when of course you really are watching like a hawk, keeping track of 15 things happening at once, and evaluating them all). Nobody likes to feel like they are being micromanaged. Sometimes it's the bride and groom who need the nudging, but they should never feel that way!
I know some feel a coordinator should be a taskmaster, but that is just not me. We do our best to befriend our vendors so they'll be happy to work with us again, and be happy to go the extra mile for us and our clients. We also pick vendors whose experience has been tested, set clear expectations, and set them up for success. We are keenly aware of, and constantly handling, the balance between "This is the only time the bride and groom will ever be able to {get this photo/chat with this friend from Japan/get time alone on the dance floor}" and "If we go into overtime, the venue starts to charge them $225/hr".
By staying on top of the timeline, in front of that crazy clock monster instead of chasing behind it, 15-minute slices at a time, nudge by nudge, you too can manage to keep the front and back of the house in perfect harmony at your wedding.
There is one more piece to the wedding timeline and schedule puzzle: timeline padding. We'll talk about that tomorrow in Part 3.
Photo courtesy Fritz Photography. Timeline graphic courtesy All Star Productions.
